Jeremy Putz, the lead pastor of the church we attend, has recently returned from a trip to Israel/Palestine, and there is probably no better place on earth to reflect upon Jesus’ words “Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.” Matt 6:12 than in the land where he spoke them. The heart-wrenching conflict that has defined this part of the world is driven by unforgiveness, but when you see the situation up close you are overwhelmed by a realization of why that is; real, effective forgiveness is not only risky, but unimaginably costly.
In his sermon on John 15:9-14 True Love Defined: Following Jesus Example Jeremy observes that great love always demands great sacrifice. Therefore real forgiveness involves letting go things we feel we should have every right to keep. In Israel/Palestine for example, where people have been killing each other’s relatives and stealing each other’s property for generations, the forgiveness that might be great enough to bring peace must be far more than simply saying “I forgive you”, even if you really meaning it. Such forgiveness requires laying down all claim to your house or land, which means giving it to whoever happens to have it now. It means, not only letting go of your bitterness toward the one who killed your father or daughter, but a willingness to lay down your own life for them as you would lay it down for your father or daughter.
If our first basic need is daily bread (the essentials of physical life), our second is surely forgiveness. And though It would be too much to suggest that unforgiveness is essential to all human discord, there are few things more effective for maintaining the cycle of conflict than the refusal to forgive. Families, friendships, workplaces and communities of all sorts, are bound together by the things we do for one another. We assist one another, encourage one another, protect, honour and feed one another. And we forgive one another. These are the economies that create and maintain community, and no society can survive without them.
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?"
Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. Matt 18:21-22
Our need for forgiveness is as daily as our need for bread, but where do we get it? Well, from the same place we get bread. Forgiveness is a gift from God, as mysterious as the grain that grows, so we pray for it. And, like God’s other gifts, when we receive it, it’s not just for us. It's a form of love and, like all love, it grows as we share it.
1 comment:
I hate it when you do that. Because I think you are right. And this does not bode well for us. Because I think it's not going to be enough to go through the motions, we're going to need actual forgiveness.
I spent years trying to forgive someone, knowing that I had to be done, knowing that my own wellbeing hinged on it, praying to be released. I could get almost there, even think I was there, and then some little thing and it was right back. I could not get to the other side. And this was someone whose offense was considerably less than killing my father, stealing my home, maiming my child. This was someone I actually loved.
Forgiveness for me came with a lot of people praying for me. They didn't know what they were praying for (neither did I), but that's what happened. And so I no longer believe that forgiveness is something I decide to do, and then do. It's a gift from God to me.
So when I started writing this I thought we were doomed. That has shifted somewhat in this writing although I still believe that we can't get there from here. If God doesn't do it it doesn't get done.
Scary.
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